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Sunday, 3 December 2023

The BSA B31 that time forgot. Part 19. Catching up time..

 Helllllooooooooo is there anybody still there? It's December, the last time I posted was way back in March.  9 months! Unbelievable...If I was to do a new update on news 'happenings' outside The Old Sidevalve Bar' then it would be the worst ever. Proper shiite show in the world. Oh!!! but hang on, hardly on a par with the main 'Wars' (unfortunately plural now) is an enquiry into the UK Governments handling of Covid...Eat Out to Help Out officially did a marvellous job of spreading the germ..A proper joke. Remember way back what ya uncle Alb said? Don't say I didn't warn ya all. Even Matts grabbing of Ginas arse in the broom cupboard got a mention.....F.F.S.

So, without further ado lets whizz back in time, catch up with any old photos taken of  'Lovely Maroon' and get a few posted.

Looks like after restoring the Genuine Lucas Barp Barper to a useable condition the attention turned to actually dropping the built part of 'Lovely Maroon' onto the floor. Suspended from the roof for quite a few years out of harms way had collected rather an impressive dust collection on it's colourful paintwork, worserer though there's now a dippy garage roof due to the weight. The dust will wipe off easy, the dip in the roof may over time relax back in a skyward direction or probably forever hold a puddle of water on top, shrug of shoulders and quietly thinking 'who knows?'. Gear Gnashing Neil helped lift the BSA goodness down onto a comfortable mat. 

But poor Nornan...in order to facilitate this complex game of musical motorcycle chairs our Norm (a model D no less) was dragged kicking and screaming up tha' garden into the top shed. (Supervised by sound asleep small person in safety seat). Luckily not the chicken shed (which really is the bottom run of the restoration ladder) Nay, the freezer shed. Norm's now parked alongside the old Indisit complete with it's internal collection of forgotten sausages, left over soups and vegan burgers. 

In no time at all..an oily rag wipe over, slam in the wheels, on with the handlebars and levers and lets be standing back to get an eye full of the bigger picture. Best colour ever!!!!!!

 
 
Stay safe....Live long and prosper... Alb

Tuesday, 7 March 2023

The BSA B31 that time forgot. Part 18. A Genuine Lucas Barp Barper!!!

 Albert here, once again bringing you the latest news from The Old Sidevalve Bar. Let me just say, this blog is guaranteed secure. Wrapped in a Faraday Cage which thus protects these very words from being copied, pasted then leaked thru' WhatsApped by Isabel Oakeshott to The Daily Telegraph for the tittilation of  the Frothy Costa Coffee and choccie cookie couch club . Phew, that's alright then......at least it leaves more space for shitte about Harry getting the boot from Frogmore.  

Don't cry-ee, don't sigh-eeThere's a silver lining in the sky-ee!Bonsoir old Harry, cheerio, chin-chinNah-poo, toodle-oo, gingy whingy, goodbye-ee!!!!

It just wouldn't be right to put a chinese peeep peeeeper on Lovely Maroon would it? Nay and thrice nay I hear you cry. Tha's needs ta' get a proper barping tool. Well, let me tell you if you've never entered the 'World of old Horn Blowers'  ya' need to be travelling with some coinage. But hang on!! what price do ya' put on a nice clear defined Baaarp Baaaarp as you give a motorcyclist salute to the passing AA man?? Well, hopefully every time I push my original 1956 handlebar button I shall be overcome with a cacophony of musical goodness. In perfect E major fortissimo. For this to indeed happen I've purchased (through the usual on line auction site) a Lucas Type HF 1440. Manufactured after 1953. HF standing for High Frequency!!! Stand back and cover ya lugs!

As usual...things aren't quite as 'simples' as they could be. My horn was bought 'untested'. (note in defence -a  new Dong-guan copy would have been twice the price and still wouldn't have worked) Phufff!!.... like the seller never stuck a battery across it...but hey, I know the sales pitch. Call it' Not Working'. What can possibly go wrong..I knocked him down £4 and became it's new owner. Correct...on arrival it didn't barp..not even a small burp or petite womanly trump......



At first glance I thought the green paint might have meant a military background, maybe seen a bit of Suez action? or done duty at The Bay of Pigs....but it proved not so as the coating didn't go underneath the outer band. Getting inside to see if the coil was still in one piece was the first step. Difficult, the front didn't unscrew enough to lift away and the risk of pulling and breaking delicate internals meant care and mucho thinking before doing anything was vital. 

Lucky old Albert....the screws that hold the contact breaker assembly (which mates internally with the armature sleeve) eventually gave in the struggle against a well aimed flame from Big Bertha (the workshop flame thrower). which was aided by a rather large screwdriver. Rather than front off it was the unsuspecting attack at the rear which instead released the covers . I'm in !!!Same difference !!


 Did the cable to the points get broken on dismantle or was it terminally damaged before? Dunno. Gently the internals were removed and sonic cleaned. A search of government wire stock found some lovely silicone rubber sheathed cable of the correct gauge. A reminder of bygone thoroughness and pride in product was found on line in the form of a 4 page workshop manual covering all 'one' needs to know about Lucas H.F. series motorcycle horns. .     Rebuild time. 

With a generous few coats of black paint and a couple of new 4BA stainless screws to hold the contact breaker assembly back in place the H.F. tooter was in danger of becoming 'Too sexy for it's Honk'..The afore mentioned honk has to be found through minute turning of the front cover which due to its fitting method moves outwards/inwards to give the correct armature sleeve gapping...Pheeeweee! Every day's a skool day!.!!!

Wasn't getting much honk from my small 6v battery so pushed 12v down its cable and with a bit of twisting and turning of adjusting screws and cover I got mi'sef a barp to frighten any lollipop lady! Hopefully when mounted on Lovely Maroon her 6v with a few more amps and a good earth behind it will do the same.

Lock the external clamping rim with a specially made Crackleport stainless bolt/nut and call it a wrap. 


Posh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get tha' kettle on...and don't hold back on the dunky Hobnobs.....This 60 year old musical instrument is back in one piece.



 

 

And if I see this fookin' clown out on the road he'll be the first to get a full 5 short blasts of Lucas H.F. 1442 right up his fat public skool ar*e..  (Which should give ample warning of my intention!!!!)







 

 

Sunday, 5 February 2023

The BSA B31 that time forgot. Part 17. Hot action at Gas MK 9 !!!

The 3 x 'C's....Crafty Cook Crackleport, that's me. Anything 'Fanny and Johnnie' can do I can do it too..but better.  I'm ever mindful of gas prices but this is where 'doing it right' comes in to play again. Hang the expense. Luke warm won't do in The Old Sidevalve Bar !!! No Sir ! Gas knob wound to max and holding it there !!! For 1.5 hours...Crikey!!!! That's gonna damage mi wallet.

You are reading this missive dear reader only because for many years your 'Uncle Albert' has been aware of the china spy factor..(didn't I warn you about G4? G5? Alexa and Siri? and Ring doorbell listening devices) Thank goodness special anti nosey filters have been deployed in these very jottings safeguarding the Vintafaker Blog's parallel reality and keeping a safety umbrella over the few normal beings left on earth. As for stray chinese weather ballons looking for vintage treasure in my bushes....I have various loaded spud guns and water pistols pointing skywards...and I'll not hesitate to use them.


Holy Helium Explosion Batman!    

Crackle Gun Emplacement One.. China Nil

Back to the cookery class.. I'd thoroughly cleaned 'Lovely Maroons' Head and Barrel and finished them off with a sonic dip before spraying with Somoniz Matt VHT Black. Curing instructions suggest first 18 hours allow to air dry followed by an oven curing of 1.5 hours building up to 220 deg C. Yep, it's written on the tin so what can wifey say?.....

In they go......all looking good.

 30 mins later and there's a wiff of burning in the kitchen...open the door to check the well being of the precious parts....second Batman quote - Holy smoke Batman!! Mi eyes are stinging...

 Life expectancy just became greatly reduced if 'Posh' should come back from the shops early. Aye...Like I was gonna tell her my plans...? What a wise Old Albert.  Oven door shut pretty damn quickly and tightly...windows opened pretty damn lively....followed by frantic tea-towel wafting. The clock ticked on, tick tock tick tock ever so slowly towards fully roasted time... Come on..Come on!!!!

Phew..at last. Paint fully cured...Don't forget..What happen's in 'The Old Sidevalve Bar' stays in 'The Old Sidevalve Bar.

Time to get that kettle on for a cuppa Rosey Lee and a celebratory dunkin' bicky. 

Motto - Cook safe, confess nothin'







Monday, 23 January 2023

The BSA B31 that time forgot. Part 16. These are the facts m'lord as I see 'um

23/01/23 Hear ye...Hear ye! Gather round for here's a BSA parts supply tale. A tale of 'What did ya expect?...What did ya get?...and the frustrations of an old skool engineer living in a modern world...an 'It'll do world'  ''let's do the minimum effort to earn Big Mc vouchers......maybe enough spondulix to buy a Costa Coffee wi' artistic sprinkles imaging what looks like 3 x monkeys arses.... 

Ahhh....apart from being at the mercy of Internet Dick Turpins I've found mi' self at the receiving end of some Government bad press this week. Yes! Taken it personally. The very government that has an ex chancellor evading paying his tax share.. ta tune of several millions..Ain't the news brilliant!! So, how come ya Old Uncle Alb fell onto the wrong side of goodness? I'll tell ya.....It won't have escaped ya attention that over the year of 2022 UK inflation went sky high..banging the door of 11%...why?? (Hey....I've lived thru far worse ya set of wooooooosers!..cut ya cloth by binnin' ya I'phone for a start, followed by Netflix) According to government bullshit news-bites it's the fault of those that don't work. Aye...Mi'self and apparantly all the others like me are causing this inflation bollocks.  Fact- Becoming a full time Vintafaker meant something had to give...I gave up being an employee to be a stalwart in the fight to save old shiite from the crusher...at my expense....yep!! self funded...surely m'lord that's a good thing??? Didn't realise likkle old me was pivotal to the uk economy. Oh...and unlike that tosser ex-chancellor Nadhim Zahawi (Mr "careless and not a deliberate mistake") which is where I came in...Careless, greedy....and anything but trying tha' best.....Easy route...One day my friends there will be more than a worm turning.

Back to the 'quality thing'. Not gonna throw about aspersions on the internetty. Just facts.  Heavy going on the grey cells?  Could be but I think most day's ya gotta put ya'sen into zones that work the grey cells..!!! Don't tell me ya' don't????  I'd ordered 4 x BSA cylinder head hold down bolts. Part No 66-0115 from a very well known UK supplier. Opting for the steel version rather than stainless after reading on-line that stainless may not have the correct properties for the job....Expansion rates etc..These were priced at £12.82 + V.A.T. each + Post. (Cost me £61.54 all in) Comparing with stainless at same supplier at £15.40 + V.A.T. each + Post or alternatively on Ebay from different supplier £112 + £4 Post per set of 4 stainless (claimed correct grade)..Hey, I didn't go for the low cost option I thought these were more fit for purpose.

 

Problem discovered whilst doing the Blu-tac worm ....(read previous blog for a quick catch up) the bolts wouldn't screw into the crankcase...Got the feeling that winding in with a spanner would damage the casting threads, thus spoiling what has survived for 65 years so far. STOP!!!!! was the general consensus among those that witnessed the event. Let's think, take a step back and do it right!! I must add that the 'original' BSA bolts screw into the threads lovely, which ever hole any were placed. Oh. m'lord mustn't forget the old bolts fit the front wheel spindle nut lovely too. (same thread size)  Not so the new version (too large again)

1st step on arriving back at 'The Old Sidevalve Bar' was to measure the thread external dia with a micrometer. Then compare with the original BSA part. I'm measuring in pre-brexit millimeters.....after 50 years of anti-imperialism it will be hard to swap back to post brexit inches, furlongs, farthings and sixpenn'orth worth.

 New hold down bolt - 17.42mm     convert to old skool and thats 0.685"

 Old hold down bolt - 17.20mm  convert to old skool and thats 0.6772"

Reference the reading to a thread chart and see what's adrift. Thread size - 11/16  20 TPI. BSC. Major thread size 0.6875"

Oh, the new are nearer to the required diameter than the old.....Strange and stranger...Surely the old guys at BSA in the '50s could read a micrometer. Well, in for a penny in for a pound as the saying goes. Gonna invest in a die and run it down the threads. As you can imagine dies to match rarely used 'Cycle threads' are not easily come by. Once again I'm not getting involved in second best..Carbon Steel is a  no... High Speed Steel only. Not direct from India or China either, sourced from a proper tool supplier not ebay. Sharp intact of breath whilst purchasing...£48!!!! Anyway tools are for life so it doesn't count.

The die was run down the new bolt threads..Hey, what do we have here. 'SWARF' !!!!! The die is shaving part of the thread. Ah ha! knew it!!! Please note m'lord that the die was held in the wrench by the centre fixing screw only so as not to reduce it's pre-set diameter.

Guess what...after a shave the bolts screwed into the crankcase as if they'd been manufactured at 'Small Heath'....

That's banged the cost of believing to buy the best into a different league...yes, could have gone for correct grade stainless and been no worse off.  steel -£61 + £48 repair = £109.  Blingy stainless all in £112.

Phuffffff. There's more to this cutting threads malarkey than meets the eye so it's just my story draw ya own conclusion.




                                      


 


Saturday, 7 January 2023

The BSA B31 that time forgot. Part 16. Don't forget ta double check the worm

 07/01/2023. Happy New Year all you 'Vintafake Appreciating Peoples'. V.A.P.s (Note -No mention of gender, but that's more by good luck than good wokey....Talking like 'it is' aint gonna change in the Shireshireshire so future Vintafake news bulletins may bring quivery lips to those arriving here by mistake) Anyways, Albert's here and ready for another year in 'The Old Sidevalve Bar' Why not? It's a wonderful cozy place...Same cobwebs hanging from the roof as last year and same projects on the workbench.. Yipeeeee..let's rock!

News in the big world? It's got to the point where if there's nothing good to say don't say anything...Even a Wokey would punch a politician in the eye these days given the chance..or even give that whinging Harry a kick in his frostbitten bollocks....F.F.S... Ya' couldn't mak' it up...a royal wi a frozen knob!!!!!!!

So, have I mentioned before about the new piston set up in Lovely Maroon?.('The BSA B31 that time forgot..) Only slighty due to the fact that the original piston was totally shot and mainly due to me thinking what a fun thing to do, the bore has been increased to accept a Triumph Bonneville piston. Not my idea, it's a popular mod for those with only 350cc of  BSA power under their seat. An increase of 50cc to a big boy 400cc is gonna make all that difference and certainly give something to chat about down at the 'coffee shop' (Not a bloody Costa barista bullshite coffee shop that added sprinkles on the frothy tops and charges 4 x Quid for the privilage ....thinking more a formica table, leatherette buttoned seat jobbie wi chipped mugs and if ya lucky a chocolate digestive on the side. "That'll be 2 and a tanner chuck!" Think 'Greasy Spoon transport' from the 60's and you've got the picture. Makes ya think...Imagine 'Lovely Maroon' suddenly waking up after her 50 year sleep and hearing George Bloody Ezra on the radio....Phufffff. That would be cruel. Will make a point of having some background Bill Haley gently caressing the ear lobes as I push down on the kick start lever for the first firing.

 
 A Maroon BSA... just because..

 Anyway.back to the piston story... A compression reducing plate is apparently needed to stop valves touching piston after the above mod. This is placed under the barrel. Recommended thickness of the aforementioned plate varies.(As always, it's a case of wadding through all the internet chaff to find the true version. I've gone middle wicket after reading various posts. My plate is 1.5mm. Skimmed it down from 6mm. (1.5mm currently out of stock in Government store room.)That was a task on the Myford I must admit. Ended up supergluing it to the backing plate to hold firm after it flew out of 4 x jaw a couple of times... narrowly missing your Uncle Albert in the process. Called a Glue Chuck if you engineers want to find out more. Worked a treat, removing after wasn't easy, (used a hot gun and gentle levering)

 
First attempt in the 4 x jaw
 
 
 'Chatter'
 
Creating the 'Glue Chuck'
 
 
Every day's a Skool Day - It worked!
 
Hot Gun and Builders Trowel - Winning Prizing Combo
 

So, the rebore is done, ....time to test if the compression plate gives the required clearance. I know a chap with some blu-tac and that's the very substance that is needed as a guide to what is happening inside the engine when the piston goes up and downy and the valves open and closey.
Just so happens that the owner of the Blu-tac is an experienced engine tuner, particulary Methanol burning big singles with wild cam timings and high compression..Purely built for no other purpose but to attack Speed Hill-climb records. Let's get over there...double quick sharpish, get the BSA engine on the bench and see if it get's the all clear from the Grand Master.
 
A room with a view - 1950's Fordson Major
 
You will maybe have noticed on the above picture...(unless you're a vintage tractor buff looking elsewhere) the wiggly worm of blu-tac expertly laid across the piston top.. Next step, bolt the head on, set the valve clearances and wind the motor carefully through 360 degrees. 
Winding report - No resistance felt as piston transfered through top dead centre on firing stroke. Oh yes!...Double check now by lifting head and inspect for deformation of the Wiggly Blu-tac worm. "The worm is intact, long live the worm" 
That's it then, the test suggests I have at least a worm clearance running the Standard Cams that are currently fitted. Compression ratio ? Somewhere between 'not much' and 'a tiny bit'..
 
As a matter of interest guess what piston/valve clearance a Methanol burning Hill Climb Special would have? How does 8 thou sound? Bloody hell....that's only 2 x fag papers .... or a very thin Wiggly worm if measuring in eurovision..
 
Posh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get tha's kettle on...I've got a reet thirst for a Tetley...(Aye, Tetley Tea bag..white wi nah sugar.) 


 
 
Images acknowledgement....because anyone appreciating Maroon BSA's and more importantly willing to dress in leather and ride them is ok by me..
Photos -imagefactory-studio.com
Italian Leather - Gin Salemó