Vinta-Translate

Wednesday, 16 April 2014

Zen and the Art of Vintafake Sustainability.

Hey dudes......I'm back !
Yes, Albert Pirsag Crackleport is still alive !!!!!! Bet you thought I'd fallen into the cider abyss of horizontalness ? No way..........I'm vertical, head at top, feet below.....correct orientation for a human being me thinks...
So, whats been happening ? I've been preparing long term. That's what life as a Vintafewker is all about....
Vintafewker ? Keyboatd malfunkchun !!!!
Vintafaker - A chap of jolly decency who looks after old shite until the kids of today realise they are making a big error by not caring for the treasure of yesteryear! (That's enough Albert old chap, don't be getting upset.) Wake up guys ! The old guys know what they are doing !!!!!!!!Look and learn !!!!!!
So, you've all heard of and read Pirsags 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance'
Pretty heavy going meaning of life stuff....
In fact I read it when I was in my teens and didn't understand a blinkin' word.
(BUT ! Robert M Pirsag (the author)did ride one of the best bikes in the world.....Oh yes ! A Honda CB72 !!! So he's forgiven....)


What's all this to do with the happenings at 'The Old Sidevalve Bar'

As I said, it's about life stuff.......preparation for the future.......Keeping the mojo vibrating.....and the flagons lubricated
I've started getting ready for the arrival of the Commer Comet.
It won't be for a while yet but just like Hayleys Comet it will arrive and astonish all who witness the spectacle...God help them !!!!!!!
Commer Comet - see Oilyracerblog

My preparations involve insuring there is enough fuel on route to enable the Comet to reach the Whiskey Distilleries in Bonnie Skirtland. This will be achieved by growing several harvests of Rape and refining the seeds into fuel oil. The first crop is now undergoing refining....Using beer brewing technology I should be able to reach a high enough octane to satisfy the needs of this highly tuned ex-marine powerplant.



Oh ! Before I go........here's a tip for any thirsty vintablogger......This high octane brew is for sale at our local 'offy' for less than 3 quid a bottle........7.5% phew.......BARGAIN !!.
Not only looks like do-gooders in Manchester are getting a bit steamed up but Posh did too and has banned me buying any more already!!!!!!!!!
There's tonnes of warnings about it on line....Why haven't I heard of it before !!!

A bottle of booze containing more alcohol than a person should drink in a WEEK is on sale in Manchester for just £3.29. The cost-per-unit, of 15p, is more than three times less than the 50p limit which doctors and health chiefs want to impose in Greater Manchester.  It comes amid warnings of a drink-related health time bomb facing the region "This means that people can buy almost six times the lower-risk daily limit for a man for less than £4. There is no doubt that this will have a health impact.
OVER THE LIMIT: The three-litre bottle of ‘Three Hammers’ cider contains more alcohol than men are warned is safe for them to drink in an entire week
    All this cider talk has got mi reel thirsty....POSH !!!!!  Go on...lend me 3 quid !!!!!Just this once !!!!
   Bollocks to the do-gooders.....and bottoms up to the Flagon lifters of 'the Old Sidevalve Bar.